tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7307964706905270102.post8042867830668180114..comments2023-07-06T03:51:07.537-07:00Comments on Blog of Lom (Löma) Nal: John M. Knapp and The CHSCAUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7307964706905270102.post-43269025558666066992011-03-27T18:27:58.995-07:002011-03-27T18:27:58.995-07:00Thank you Monica!
:)
~carolThank you Monica!<br /><br />:)<br />~carolonepersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10395600714257162622noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7307964706905270102.post-11651154300730321112011-03-27T12:33:53.239-07:002011-03-27T12:33:53.239-07:00I agree with the people who said you are having a ...I agree with the people who said you are having a normal response to an abnormal situation, Oneperson. You are courageous to be speaking out and coming forward and you have nothing at all to be ashamed of and much to be proud of.Monica Pignottihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05096661553832690178noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7307964706905270102.post-54035399674880698952011-03-26T16:32:40.281-07:002011-03-26T16:32:40.281-07:00PS: As my manner is, I've had quite a few afte...PS: As my manner is, I've had quite a few after thoughts since posting my two previous comments. <br /><br />One of those is that I struggle with feeling embarrassed that I would be affected so deeply by what has happened. I wish I could just brush it off. In comparison to other trauma, it's small. Yet, I have to remind myself that my responses over the last seven-plus months are understandable. I have to acknowledge and honor those response, while at the same time regulate them utilizing various tools from my emotional tool box. <br /><br />This past week, two people who know the situation shared with me that the intense anxiety I'm experiencing is a normal response to cognitive dissonance. I don't recall ever hearing it put that way before.<br /><br />Of course, I've been reminded that my anxiety is a normal response to an abnormal circumstance.<br /><br />And I am thankful for all the good in life. There is much to be grateful for. I wrote last night that gratitude is a great equalizer.<br /><br />Thanks Lom for sharing your thoughts and experiences.<br /><br />~carolonepersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10395600714257162622noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7307964706905270102.post-63516140227772299742011-03-26T11:49:20.013-07:002011-03-26T11:49:20.013-07:00(Note: This reply comment 2 of 2, as my reply was ...(Note: This reply comment 2 of 2, as my reply was too long for Blooger to fit into one comment.)<br /><br />(cont'd):<br />In hindsight, I wish I would have heeded concerns that folks expressed to me about Knapp not long after I first hired him, and that I had listened more carefully to certain doubts and my own intuitive thoughts as I observed some of Knapp's words and behavior. But I trusted him and thus rationalized those nudges.<br /><br />I too am still listed as a moderator and administrator on his reactivated Knapp Family Counseling discussion board. It disturbs me that John did not honor my clear resignation that I sent him via email at the beginning of August.<br /><br />As far as the non-profit and corporation status of CHSCA, I guess time will tell. I would find it difficult to think that John would make such claims and state that the org is applying for tax-deductible status, if the org is not incorporated (if that is the right word). But...I also found it difficult to admit that the person who I trusted as my therapist to help aid in recovery from toxic relationships would end up emotionally and verbally abusing.<br /><br />Well, that's a long ramble.<br /><br />You are welcome to share this reply comment elsewhere as you feel appropriate.<br /><br />To life,<br />~carolonepersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10395600714257162622noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7307964706905270102.post-15745912654114220312011-03-26T11:45:52.859-07:002011-03-26T11:45:52.859-07:00(Note: This is comment reply 1 of 2.)
Hey Lom,
I...(Note: This is comment reply 1 of 2.)<br /><br />Hey Lom,<br /><br />I read your blog entry shortly after you let me know you had posted it.<br /><br />I wasn't sure how to respond, until within the last hour.<br /><br />I visited the Facebook page of the CHSCA. I no longer have a FB account; I found the FB page via a link on Twitter. The FB page is called "The Center 4 Healing."<br /><br />As I perused the FB page, I thought I was going to throw up, literally. <br /><br />Before reading finding/viewing that FB page, I was thinking this morning as I was reviewing Dr. Lalich's book,<i>"Take Back Your Life,</i> "How did I end up here again?" <br /><br />It's an odd feeling reading the book (mentioned above)that helped me in regard to my own recovery from cultic abuse, reading the book that Knapp used with me in helping me through the myriad aspects of confusion, loss, grief, self-blame, doubting my reality, and other stuff that comes with toxic relationships...the very book that helped me...well...now has a triggering effect.<br /><br />I guess it's kind of like the guidebook (such as the Bible in Christianity) that helped people that then triggers them. They have to find other resources or another version. The difference is, I never took Dr. Lalich's book as "the absolute truth" or as "god-breathed." And my abusive experience wasn't with Lalich; it was with Knapp.<br /><br />Once the professional investigation is complete, I may at that time publicize the summary of the complaint.<br /><br />I will state the following in italics, quoting from something I've written elsewhere:<br />"<i>[Practitioner] used four of my deepest vulnerabilities against me. Those are self-blame, self-distrust, fear of abandonment, and intimidation when relating with certain authority figures. Not to mention other issues I have worked to overcome, which include low self-worth, shame, and thinking I am unintelligent.</i>" <br /><br />And also:<br />"<i>I have experienced the following in varying degrees since the trauma. The following list is reprinted from <a href="http://website.lineone.net/~vex/How%20Therapists%20Abuse.htm" rel="nofollow">How Therapists Abuse Their Clients</a>:<br /><br /> * Complete devastation and despair (feeling like <a href="http://www.ivcc.edu/rambo/eng1001/munch.htm" rel="nofollow">Munch's The Scream</a>)<br /> * Self blame and feelings of failure, guilt and confusion<br /> * Loss of self-confidence and self-esteem [...]<br /> * Withdrawal and inability to talk about the abuse; and feeling also that no one understands<br /> * Doubting your own perceptions and reality<br /> * Emotional detachment or "shutting down" (leading among other things to loss of empathy and lack of emotional response within oneself)<br /> * Intrusive negative rumination/intrusive negative thoughts/flashbacks<br /><br />In addition to the list above, I have experienced a sense of loss; wanting to forget and pretend my past never happened; grief; feeling I was crazy and making things up or had done things that I didn't do; feelings that I am unintelligent, childish, and stupid; wanting to disappear or become obscure; depression; anxiety; bad dreams; and some episodes of anger. I have also had to take more Xanax than I've needed all year previously and have had physical somaticizing symptoms which include lung and back pain. I started back on Paxil in September.</i>"<br /><br />(continued in next reply due to length..)onepersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10395600714257162622noreply@blogger.com